My theory

Here is my theory:

A few days ago my mom was whistling the song "If I only had a brain" from the Wizard of OZ. "I wonder why that song is stuck in my head," she said.
"I don't know. Maybe because you are happy," I replied.
"Do you ever feel guilty for being happy?"
"No. Do you?"
"All the time."
"I don't have the right to be happy."
"Yes you do. In fact, you have more of a right to be happy."
"Then who?"
"Then people who have never lost anyone."
"You're right. I should celebrate life. Thank you Katie. Thank you."
"You're welcome." I said shyly and my mom went back to whistling. I joined in.

That's my theory anyway. If you have lost someone, you have more of a right to be happy then someone who has never lost anyone, someone who hasn't been sick with cancer or face death in some way. A lot of my friends think movies where dogs die are the saddest movie they ever saw. Try watching a movie where a sister has to watch her brother die a few months after your brother died and then try telling me that the movie "Marley and Me" is sad. One of my friends was telling me how sad it was and I told her that it wasn't. And then she asked me if I had every lost a dog. So I told her. Yes. And a brother, aunt, grandfather, 2 dogs and 2 cats. She apologized.



I am scared. Scared of falling. It doesn't matter what it is, I am scared.
If I am on top of a rock, I start to tremble so much that I am afraid to move, to jump across to the next rock. It means that I am afraid to trust people, I am afraid that they will drop me and I will fall to the ground. In my life, I haven't trusted too many people not to let me fall. I can count it on one hand. And surprisingly, there are a few people that I am surprised to make the list. There is one guy who I trust with anything and yet most days I absolutely hate him. But if he offers his hand, I know that he won't drop me. Its a little crazy who you trust and I am not sure why I trust him.



Lately I've been getting into photography. So much so that I got my dad's old slr camera fixed and I bought a new DSLR camera. To celebrate, I have started a new project. Starting January 1, 2010, I decided that I would take one photo a day. I am very excited about the project.